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Gordon Streaman 2 Review

Gordon Streaman 2 is billed as a life simulator, but is actually limited to how a guy named Gordon gets by while locked up in an apartment. Gordon’s daily life requirements consist of taking a shower, urinating, eating, and sleeping. Other than that, Gordon is free to do whatever he likes during the day. Usually, Gordon putters around on the computer, sweeps the floors, and plays clicking games with his phone. The clicking games somehow earn him a few cents per game, and Gordon uses the money to have food delivered straight to his refrigerator. This is what passes for a simulation of Gordon’s life.

GS2 comes with no instructions, although a tip on the screen shows the player that the Tab key will bring up a menu with four items available: A phone, what looks like a paint roller, a broom, and an empty hand. The WASD keys for movement are hard-coded, even the arrow keys don’t work and there are no options to remap any keys (sorry left-handers). However, there are numerous graphics configuration options, which is quite amazing considering that the models and textures look like they just walked out of a time machine from 1999. There are a few sound effects, but no music.

To get the cash to fill up the ‘fridge, Gordon must be tapping on the phone as often as possible. There are is a phone app called “Tickstonk” that produces money and each one will produce some cash after a number of successful mouse clicks in the center of a circle. Exactly what this clicking represents isn’t discernable, but apparently the people in Gordon’s world love it. If Gordon gets enough likes, he could level up and make more money. Gordon can also start a stream on his computer using an app called “Two.Watch”, assuming he is desperate to exercise his index finger even more.

There doesn’t seem to be any penalty if Gordon ignores life’s work and just stands idle. In fact, Gordon can do nothing for days and the worst thing that will happen is the screen flashing and pulsing with indications that Gordon needs to eat or sleep, etc. GS2 includes a few Easter eggs, a little doll that laughs with a cackle that would make Kamala Harris jealous and (surprise!), a click game on the computer where failure results in hackers stealing money from Gordon’s account. This is the extent of Gordon’s world; he never leaves his little apartment. Gordon Streaman 2 is a smooth playing clickfest for right-handed players that want to simulate basement dwelling, otherwise, it is not recommended.

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Jacmac is an ancient gamer that loves open world, strategy, FPS, and tactical sims, but will play almost anything.

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